-i didn’t drop my first F-bomb until I was 22. not coincidentally, it was the same year i moved to new york.
-i have driven a car about 4 times in the past 9 years. i used to love driving more than anything, and now I’m terrified. nothing annoys my husband about me more than this (that i know of…)
-i like blueberry muffin mix with those little artificial blueberry bits better than fresh blueberry muffins. i also prefer tollhouse slice and bake cookies to almost every other freshly baked cookie.
-i portrayed ’70s era gloria steinem in a “fashionable feminists” spread for bust magazine a few years ago. i never showed anyone the issue because the outfit they put me in was drop-dead hideous and my face looked fat. this probably makes me the worst feminist ever.
-i was approached by a porn director on the street in my early 20s. in a completely unrelated incident, i was also mistaken for a prostitute while in a wendy’s parking lot on my lunch break during my stint as an elementary school teacher. i am exuding some kind of sexual energy that i am not aware of.
-i still want to be an author when i grow up. unfortunately, i still have no idea what i would want to write a book about.
-a year or two ago, i was sent a teddy bear as some kind of traveling photo project. i was supposed to take a picture of the bear doing something fun in nyc, then include the photo in an album to be mailed back to a 6-year-old boy in austin. the due date was september 2011. the bear and the book are still sitting in the corner of my bedroom because i don’t have the heart to get rid of them and i’m too embarrassed to send them back to the kid. (after writing this, it’s clear i need to take this bear on a whirlwind weekend and mail it back to him).
-i’ve only been really, really drunk once. it took me an hour to crawl up 5 flights of stairs to my apartment and i spent the entire night puking. i haven’t wanted to duplicate that experience.
-when people ask what religion I am, i’m still not sure how to answer.
* this is like way easier than writing out one cohesive story. i think i’ll start sharing my confessions regularly. it was cathartic.